Inventory is finally done. And I couldn’t be happier. Ironically as soon as I started getting used to working all night long, and pretty much sleeping all day, it was time to switch it back up to waking up at 4:45AM and working all day, and hoping to sleep all night. I am so glad I don’t have a regular graveyard shift. While it was sometimes fun, it wasn’t THAT fun. And it doesn’t matter how long you sleep during the day, it is just not the same. My room wasn’t dark enough and my internal clock kept clashing with my tired body because it was like 9am and there I was trying to fall asleep. Once I fell asleep it was really hard to wake up for the day. But it’s over and life is going back to normal. Well…whatever normal is.

The weekend is almost here. Any plans? My weekend would’ve been tomorrow and Saturday, but my brilliant self asked to come in for a few hours tomorrow. So I’ll only have Saturday off. Oh well. I want to finish my weekly workload and the thought of a few extra dollars is really nice. I do wish I was off on Sunday though. Thankfully I’m finally starting to make plans with friends though! So I’m looking forward to FINALLY hanging out with my friend Ashley on Saturday. Then I’ll be grabbing lunch with my friend Amy sometime next week. Also making plans to go to the State fair and maybe the local County fair too. We shall see!

Tomorrow as soon as I am done with my short work day I’m going to upgrade my phone. Woohoo! I’ll never be cool enough to own an iPhone but I do get to be cool enough to own an Android once again heh. I’m so ready to be rid of the really cheap phone I got when I first switched cell providers. And the company I’m with is running a nice promo right now so…. a little reward for the insane hours I’ve been working, and the fact that I was patient and waited for a better bargain, I’m getting a new phone. Yay for that! And then I think I’ll treat myself to lunch somewhere. Not sure where yet. I don’t want to stick with the food court, but knowing how I’ll probably not want to walk anyway…. that’ll probably be what I choose. Oh well. I’m going to have a good day and a great weekend!

Oh! Guess what I get to do at work next week? I get to break stuff AND get paid for it! Are you curious? hehehe!!

And here we go with a brand new year. Happy New Year everyone! And with the start of a new year, is a new layout, and a secured mzkitteh.net for one more year! How has 2012 been treating you so far? Did you go out last night? I went to my sister in law’s sister’s house. It was fun sitting out by the fire, drinking yummy drinks, and roasting marshmallows. I didn’t have anyone to kiss but I also didn’t wake up with a hangover this morning. Yeah! I didn’t really drink that much anyway. But since I don’t drink hard liquor much anymore I’m never sure how it’s going to hit me. But I was fun and I had a nice time. I hope you all did too!
Do you make new year’s resolutions?

And this begins the blog where I type about anything I want to because I feel very chatty…and random! And nothing good ever comes of the randomness, right? I caught myself being a bit too twitter chatty because I’m simply feeling that… chatty. I have no one to talk about nonsense and randomness to, so I guess I’ll talk to myself here. How ya doin’, Kitteh? No, I’m not going to be that specific (or lame) Ugh.

Anywho. I’m on day one of two days off, and it’s leaving me a bit… anxious. Not bad anxious just… anxious. I want to DO something. New Years Eve is almost here and I have no plans. I don’t know if I have to work on New Years Day, yet. But even if I do I still want some epic plans. I surely won’t have anyone to kiss at midnight. *eyeroll* but just because I’m a constant fail when it comes to the dating scene, doesn’t mean I want to sit alone in my room, being a loser. Nope. No thank you!

I know we all say it every year. Next year will be better, it’ll be different, it’ll be GOOD. And I’m going to have the same mentality again. I want it to be different…better… etc. I want to continue working on myself, inside out, all that jazz. I am started to do that now, I guess. I’m trying to be less lazy and get myself to be more active again. Guess what I got? Just Dance 3! I’ve missed dancing sooooo much. And while it’s not quite the same as my dance class days, it’s still fun and it definitely gets the heart rate up. I’m not gonna lie though. I kinda wish I had an Xbox 360 w/ Kinect so I could dance without having to hold onto something. BUT I’m definitely NOT complaining! I’ve had a blast dancing to a few of the songs, and attempting to memorize the steps so I can get better. I’ll be doing the 7 day challenge as well. AND I’m going to work on getting healthy food back into the house, tracking calories, and everything. I don’t want to be a fat girl anyone. I want to feel beautiful again! And this time, I truly want it for my self, FIRST.

Ok. I’m all talked out finally. Back to watching The Polar Express… Yes. Again. I’m that awesome

I just wanted to stop by and wish everyone a very Merry Christmas! I know, Christmas will be over in less than two hours. But it’s officially STILL Christmas! I hope you had a nice day. Mine was good. Back to work tomorrow, and then I get two more days off! I’m watching National Lampoons Christmas Vacation right now and getting ready to fall asleep soon. I drank some champagne and while it didn’t make me buzzed or drunk. That would be stupid when I have to be up so early tomorrow. It made me very sleepy. So, expect another obligatory “what did you get?” type post tomorrow. And to all a good night

It’s 10pm and I’m still in shock that it’s Christmas Eve. It surely doesn’t feel like it. The only thing that feels right is 24 hours of A Christmas Story marathon, which is currently on my tv and will stay on it until we leave for dinner with family tomorrow afternoon. Otherwise…. it just doesn’t feel like it. I got a late start with my shopping this year. Late start with next to no money. I wish I could’ve done more but….everyone will have something to open. That’s all that matters. I’ll be so glad when things get back to “normal” at work. One more week of possible holiday craziness. And then the first week of January starts off inventory. 3 days straight of working overnight, 9pm-3am, and then things should slow down a bit. And then I can get back to focusing on finding a second job. 2012…. Has got to be the year of good things to come. Well, enough of this. Back to the movie!

For the past two-three years, I’ve had back problems. At first it was mainly my lumbar area. And I was on pain medications to help manage it because it would get so bad. I was also getting MRI’s done to see how severe it was. I was attempting to keep it to a manageable level so that I could still work and do physical activities without being in too much pain. Hip hop class actually helped with it. There were times when I knew I over did it, but for the most part it helped keep my muscles busy and as healthy as possible. And then I moved here. I no longer had doctors to help and keep me on a pain regimen. I couldn’t afford to go to a doctor since I didn’t have insurance. So I just dealt with it. And then I noticed issues revolving around sciatica. Nothing like walking and suddenly having a sharp pinching pain shoot from your bum to back of the leg. There’s days when I avoid walking or standing as long as I have to. Between the sciatica and lumbar issues I start to feel older than my actual age. If I sit down at work it takes me a bit to straighten up because I’m locked in a certain position. But still, I deal with it. I have insurance now so I’ve been researching doctors, but still not worrying too much because the idea of having to get to know a new doctor makes me really nervous. I really liked my doctors in San Diego. I had a good relationship with them. I didn’t have to worry about trying to explain everything because they just knew. I was comfortable. Anyway, I think it’s getting to be time for me to suck it up and get acquainted with a doctor. I’ve noticed that things seem to be getting worse today. I’d be working and the pain would shoot to like… the middle of my bum and cause a really rapid muscle spasm. I had a hard time walking today because of that. I kept trying to walk normal even when the weird spasms would happen. I didn’t want customers to look at me and wonder WTF was going on. And then I had to walk a little bit extra because my bus driver had to take a detour to get to my stop.
I was so glad to come home and just lay down. I’m off for the next two days so hopefully I can take advantage of the time and rest my body. But I don’t want to be confined to the couch the entire time either. Another thing I’ve noticed it the side of my leg goes numb. I freaked a bit the other day when I went to touch it for whatever reason, and it was totally numb all up one side. It was such a WEIRD feeling. I don’t know if it was just a weird fluke, or if it’s associated with everything else…I just hate these pains, and the new ones I’m experiencing. I kinda wish I knew someone who goes through this so I could get some advice. Yes, I obviously need to see a doctor. But I’d also just like to talk to someone I know. I used to know someone who went through it. I remember how painful it was for them. At the time I just tried to understand, but nowadays I definitely DO understand. I do different stretching exercises when I can but I think I need more than that. Not that I want to have to go back to relying on pain meds, but if it helps me get around then I may have to take a little bit of help in that direction. I have a really LOW pain tolerance. But I’ve learned to take on a LOT since moving here, and not having the meds. to help me. I just need to suck it up and go to a doctor. What’s the point of having insurance if I don’t use it?

Well here we are. Sunday afternoon. Exactly one week until Christmas. And I can say without a doubt, I am feeling very…neutral. I’m not excited. Nothing major is going to be happening. I’m pretty sure I won’t be getting the one thing I wanted this year. And it’s definitely something that can’t be wrapped. Maybe next year. Every year it’s the same thing. Maybe next year will be different. Maybe things will be better. Maybe this, or maybe that. Oh well. Meanwhile, I’m relaxing while watching The Polar Express and trying to clear my mind. Way too many thoughts running around up there. And I’m pretty bummed because I wasn’t able to renew F-K or the hosting. I probably wouldn’t have been able to until sometime next month. I’m not even sure if I can access my files or account to try to attempt to secure it a bit longer. I just can’t worry about it. And it’s probably for the best. But, having to let it go does make me a little sad. I’ll definitely renew this domain in a couple weeks. It’s a lot more affordable than trying to secure F-K AND the hosting for it. It is what it is. And now that I’ve gotten distracted and need to start dinner… This entry ends… Now. Buhbye!

I’ve been meaning to blog but I’ve had no real subject to talk about. I couldn’t even come up with a worthy subject line. I’m trying to be more active with this but to be honest, there’s nothing worth talking about. December is going by pretty quickly. It’s been having it’s ups and downs. Between not getting many hours at work ever so suddenly, to having my heart ripped apart once again, and still feeling the effects of that, not really knowing what’s going to happen for Christmas and New Years, school/financial aid stresses, and just general bouts of blah-ness. I haven’t felt very chatty. I’ve been doing ok though. I could be handling things a lot worse, but I’m still keeping some sense of hope within me. I just fall into moments of wanting to just go to sleep and sleep forever. But I don’t want to let certain things defeat me. I figure it’s just another one of life’s tests that will bring me to something better. I keep telling myself that anyway. Tis the season to be jolly? Yeah, it’s a work in progress.

….To make me happy. It honestly doesn’t. Granted I’ve been having an off day today. I woke up feeling a bit gloomy and I can’t really figure out why. I’m just chalking it up to a bad day and moving on with my life. One easy way to cheer me up, is to show certain movies on tv that bring out the inner child in me. I am currently watching The Santa Clause for the uhhh 5th time this holiday season? And then 30 minutes after this movie ends, The Polar Express will be on. I’m stoked! These two movies are up there in my top 5 of all time favorite Christmas movies. With A Christmas Story being number 1! And that is safe and sound in my Amazon video library, for me to watch whenever I want to. I love Christmas shows. Even when I’m feeling down and pretty darn pathetic for it, I can always turn to these movies to cheer me up. Even if for just a little bit.

Wow… two entries in one day? It must be all the coffee I drank today

I’ve had a few people ask me what I am asking for, for Christmas (Giftmas) this year. And at least 3/4′s of those people were shocked to hear me say that I wasn’t asking for anything. I haven’t made a Christmas wish list in at least three years. The closest I ever come to it, is my list on Elfster. But that’s for Secret Santa so I can justify it. But to make a list, to give to no one, because I haven’t actually had a Christmas that involved exchanging gifts in quite a while. I’m sure my family will exchange a few little things, but nothing that warrants a list. Last I checked, I have no significant other, and no children, so the need for a list is really not there. It’s not about presents for me. I just wish I had people to do fun Holiday related things with. Can I put that on a wish list? If so then there ya go. I wish for friends, that lived near me. I wish for someone who would want to invest some time in me. I wish I could help my family with the financial struggles a lot more than I do right now.

Meanwhile, I am planning/pricing a few things that I would like to get for myself, after the holidays. Probably around tax time, if I get anything back. I’m definitely going to be investing in Just Dance. I’d like all three since they all seem really fun. But I think I’m going to get the third one and work on the other two later. My tv is dying in its old age, so because Kmart offers layaway year around, I’m finally going to upgrade tvs sometime next month. I would’ve done that already, but even if I don’t really have many to shop for this year, I wouldn’t feel right getting something for myself now, when it can surely wait until after Christmas is over. Someone had mentioned maybe getting me an iPhone but due to circumstances that definitely isn’t happening. I am in desperate need for a new hair cut. My hair has grown out in one hell of a wonky way. That might actually be something I get taken care of soon, as in, my next check.

It’s kinda unnerving to see someone stressing so much about what they’re going to ask for, on Twitter. If that’s the biggest problem in your life, consider yourself very lucky, very selfish, very materialistic, or all of the above. When people ask me what I’d want for Christmas, I can’t ever give an answer. I feel really weird trying to answer that question.

You know what I really want? Someone to take me around to the neighborhoods with Christmas lights. We’d pack up the car, load up with Christmas cookies, hot chocolate, and Christmas music on the radio, and just drive around.
Happy Christmas memories are better than any gift found under a Christmas tree.